Saturday, September 21, 2013

Life lately

A few times recently, a dear family member has asked me, "So, Alaina, what have you been up to lately?" Every time I say, "Being a mama!" And he looks at me and says, "That's it?!"

That's it??

Oh, I'm that not enough?! 

I was so happy when I came across THIS beautifully written article about how new mom's get nothing (yet SO MUCH) done in a day. I feel like this article captures my sentiment exactly and resonates with me on a deep level.

"So the next time you find yourself wondering how another day is gone and nothing is done, stop. Hold your baby—feel the way that tiny body strains to contain this giant soul—complete, and full of potential all at the same time. Take a deep, slow breath. Close your eyes and measure your day not as tasks, but as feelings, as sounds, as colors. Exhaustion is part of it. And it’s true, you will get “nothing” done. But the hard parts will fade. The intense, burning love is what remains, and it is yours to keep forever."

Another beautiful article I came across recently is THIS one about the importance of breastfeeding in public. This has become A LOT easier for me than it was at the beginning. I was so nervous at first and tried to keep myself covered completely, while struggling to hold tiny Ava and make sure she got a proper latch. Now, I just bust out the boob and go about my business! I just try to be discreet and not flash my nipples. But, it happens sometimes. What can I say? Luckily, I feel like I live in a very conscious, open-minded community and feel supported to nurse in public. 

And on the topic of breastfeeding, THIS article brought tears to my eyes. I too am guilty of this. When Ava was first born, I couldn't take my eyes off of her. When she would nurse, I would just gaze down at her and feel my heart swell several sizes too big for my chest. I'm not sure when it happened but, at some point I stopped watching her while she nursed and instead I would take out my phone and catch up on texting or emails or facebook. I guess it was because, it was the ONLY time in the day I could do those things. Breastfeeding is supposed to be about bonding. But, is it really bonding if you are not present and are staring at your phone instead of your baby? It is staggering to me how fast Ava is growing already. So, I am making a point to put down the phone when I nurse her, so I can give her my full attention. Because I want to cherish every moment and not miss a single thing!

I just feel so honored and blessed to be a mama. What a sacred journey it has been and continues to be. It definitely comes with its struggles and challenges but, I think that's part of what it makes it so beautiful and rewarding. I feel like I'm tapping into parts of my being that I didn't know existed and feeling new elements of myself arise and blossom. Life has become a new and different journey and I'm feeling it all on a deeper level than ever before. It's like I've entered into the sweetest chapter of life. Every page brings forth deeper meaning and profound truth. Love abounds!